Wellness notes · 1 min read
Desire can arrive later
Not all desire begins spontaneously; for many people it appears after closeness or stimulation begins.
Pleasure, knowledge, self-discovery
A more thoughtful
conversation.
Short notes and deeper reading about pleasure, bodies, relationships and intimate wellbeing - considered without shame or sensationalism.
Short and useful
Wellness notes
Carefully sourced facts, practical ideas and gentle prompts for a more informed relationship with pleasure.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
The body is not a mind reader
Physical arousal and subjective desire do not always match - and a bodily response never equals consent.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
The afterglow can last two days
In a study of newlyweds, elevated sexual satisfaction lasted for about 48 hours.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Cuddling is not just an extra
Affection after sex has been linked with greater sexual and relationship satisfaction.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
New experiences can reawaken connection
Couples doing an exciting unfamiliar activity reported larger immediate gains than couples doing a routine task.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Feeling understood can be attractive
A partner’s responsiveness - feeling heard, valued and cared for - may support desire.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Laughing together is a good sign
In a study of 71 couples, shared laughter was linked with closeness and relationship quality.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
A good night of sleep may help
In a small 14-day study, longer sleep was associated with more next-day sexual desire among women.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
More sex does not always mean more happiness
Across three studies, the link between frequency and wellbeing levelled off beyond about once a week.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
How you talk matters
A meta-analysis of 93 studies found that the quality of sexual communication mattered more than its frequency.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Sometimes good sex ends in tears
Postcoital dysphoria can bring sadness, irritability or tears after consensual and satisfying sex.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Pleasure toys are not only for solo time
A six-country European survey found that toys are used both alone and with steady partners.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
The clitoris has a hidden side
The visible tip is only one part of a much larger internal structure.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
More than 10,000 nerve fibres?
A small anatomical study estimated about 10,280 myelinated fibres in the paired main clitoral nerves.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Penetration is not the whole story
In a large US survey, only 18.4% of women said intercourse alone was sufficient for orgasm.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Kissing is not universal
Romantic kissing feels timeless, yet a study of 168 cultures found evidence of it in only 46%.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
A kiss has a tiny guest list
A ten-second intimate kiss can transfer around 80 million bacteria - a reminder that closeness has a microbiome.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
A fantasy is not a to-do list
What appears in the imagination does not automatically describe a real-life wish or intention.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
The pheromone perfume myth
Human attraction is complex; no bottled molecule has been reliably shown to work as a universal romantic switch.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Pleasure can happen in sleep
Sleep orgasms are a recognised experience for some women - and not having them is equally normal.
Wellness notes · 2 min read
Sex and relationships in numbers: part one
Ten often-repeated figures about partners, first experiences, orgasm, sleep and contraception-with the context that headlines usually leave out.
Wellness notes · 2 min read
Bodies, pleasure and health in numbers: part two
Ten survey figures about fantasy, condoms, orgasm, masturbation, sexual health and habits-and why the sample always matters.
Wellness notes · 2 min read
Desire, habits and research in numbers: part three
Ten more figures about identity, energy, initiative, sexual health, desire and research-with corrections where popular claims overreach.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Pleasure and sleep: what we actually know
Survey research suggests people often perceive better sleep after orgasm, but it does not prove that orgasm treats sleep problems.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Oxytocin and orgasm: a nuanced connection
Oxytocin often rises around orgasm, yet the hormone’s role in desire, bonding and wellbeing is more complex than a single “love hormone” label.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
Can sexual activity help a headache?
Some people with migraine reported partial or complete relief during sexual activity; others felt worse. The response is individual.
Wellness notes · 1 min read
How long does intercourse last?
In one multinational stopwatch study, the median time for intravaginal ejaculation latency was 5.4 minutes-with wide variation between couples.
Long-form editorial
Journal
Journal · 2 min read
Why she loves you but doesn’t always want sex
The difference between love and longing - and the conversations that can bring two people closer.
Journal · 2 min read
The secret to keeping desire alive after years together
Forget the pressure to recreate your first date. Lasting passion may have more to do with curiosity than grand gestures.
Journal · 2 min read
Single doesn’t mean pleasureless
Discovering intimacy on your own - without shame, without a deadline and without waiting for somebody else.